Pushy

 Seth Godin wrote a blog this week on Pushiness and the following stuck out to me:

It's easy to rationalize your pushiness, imagining that the other person really wants to do this project. And it's just as easy to minimize the value you add, hiding in a corner instead of bringing your value forward. Pushiness is in the eye of the beholder. Generosity requires that we be aware of how the other person is feeling about the forward motion we're trying to make. 

Pushiness is definitely all relative. I can act the same in a variety of situations and it's all about if I feel like I'm trying to literally push the other person along with me or if we are happily moving forward together that determines if the process is a productive and joyful one. 

The other tricky part with trying to push people along is there is no ownership developed. It's helpful in the short term, but in the long term the thing you were working on usually burns out. When I'm aware enough and not caught up in a deadline, having a conversation about understanding their resistance to forward motion can be helpful. I'm also learning to accept when it's just not the right time. When someone might not be ready to move forward for whatever reason and no matter how urgent it is for me I might need to slow down in order for us to get up to the same speed.