Learning to Take – 2020 Intentions

Around this time of year, many of us turn to resolutions, intentions, etc. to help power us forward in our journeys.

Last year, my intention was to lean into family time. I knew that 12 months home with my daughter would fly by and that it was important to soak up every bit of those early days.  I stripped away everything else except a couple of light volunteer activities (which Elly could attend with me). Family was not just number one, it was the only priority I had. Knowing how fully I focused on our family for a year is making it easier for me to add in other things now. We’re operating from that strong foundation we took the time to build.

So what’s this year all about? The theme that came to me wasn’t one I was expecting.

I was listening to Podcast Playlist on CBC, which was featuring a show called Show Your Work – which gives a behind the scenes look at two women in the film/theatre business. The segment they played though was about them as wives and mothers. Lainey and Duana were sharing how they had to learn to take. That they couldn’t rely on their husband’s or colleagues hopefully giving them what they need. They actively had to take what they needed to move their careers forward.

Giving is my natural mode of operation. I love being generous.  I’ve also learned the hard way that you can give too much and not have enough to serve yourself. That brought on needing to learn a new skill – receiving. Reciprocity is a two-way street and we need to learn how to drive on both sides.

Listening to Lainey and Duana’s conversation, I realized that taking is the third part of this equation. I’m thinking of the three of them as three legs to the same stool. How do you ensure that all three are strong? Otherwise, the stool will fall over.

That’s what I’m working on in 2020. Learning to take what I need to move my family and career forward. The first step is wrapping my head around how to let go of the guilt associated with it. Even writing this the lizard brain is saying “why are you going to work on being more selfish? That isn’t nice. People will like you less.” I can feel it’s a fear-based thing though, assuring me that I’m likely moving in the right direction.