Defying Gravity

For 20 years, I’ve listened to Defying Gravity from Wicked and had the same reaction: goosebumps and welling up with tears. At the end of the song, Elphaba declares that she’s shedding the norms and pressures of what’s expected to rise into what her heart calls her to do for herself and for others. You witness her choosing to belong to herself first. 

The new Wicked movie came out the day after my birthday and going to see it was part of the three days celebration we hosted this year to celebrate. 

Watching Part 1 of the movie and witnessing Cynthia Erivo deliver this awe inspiring song, I saw more clearly the way the movie and its songs capture so much of our human nature and journey with othering, us and themness, belonging to ourselves and others and willingness to preserve what we perceive as our own safety even at the expense of another’s. 

Watching the movie (both times!), I thought this is what my 40s are going to be about.

Something has changed within me
Something is not the same
I’m through with playing by the rules of someone else’s game
Too late for second-guessing
Too late to go back to sleep
It’s time to trust my instincts, close my eyes and leap

It’s time to try defying gravity
I think I’ll try defying gravity
And you can’t pull me down

I’m through accepting limits
‘Cause someone says they’re so
Some things I cannot change, but ’til I try, I’ll never know
Too long I’ve been afraid of
Losing love, I guess I’ve lost
Well, if that’s love, it comes at much too high a cost

I’d sooner buy defying gravity
Kiss me goodbye, I’m defying gravity
And you can’t pull me down

I’m grateful that, unlike Elphaba, I don’t have to fly solo. I have so many kindred and connected hearts and spirits that are striving to defy gravity every day, too. 

Thank you so much to everyone who helped celebrate my 40th this year. I so appreciate every happy birthday post, message, donation and karaoke song you all shared.